Letters on my Desk

by R.T. Allenson

This is what passes between us, letters on each other’s desk detailing how we feel for each other. They find it quaint but sometimes I wonder if it’s because we’re both afraid to tell each other what we really feel.

You know, we make it so difficult sometimes. We know each other so well now, so why do we resort to these correspondences? It’s so funny sometimes…looking back at our journey from way back to now. All the things we went through, the happy times and the sad ones. The times we made each other cry, the time we let each other go and the time we went back to each other’s arms. All these were through little letters we’d secretly place on each other’s desk, and the anticipation and dread that came with it..such a different kind of love we have.

Sometimes I’d wonder what my life would be like if I never met you. To be honest when I remember all the fights we had, I still feel the sting of our words when we excoriated each other to make our point known; sometimes you have to be cruel to make a point, as I would always say, but I would never change what we went through.

I told you once during the pinnacle of our break-up that I wanted to forget you. I lied of course, I never forget anything and I can die a million times and I still won’t forget you. Yours is a different kind of love that you give me and I’m so happy that we’re back together, stronger than ever.

I’m writing another letter to you detailing what I want to say to you right now but…I know you already know this. We’re through with the letters on my desk…or the letters on yours. It’s better to just say it to you anyways but I’ll write it down, just for old times sake.